Favs

So Shando had a conversation with me yesterday about favorites. She was tagged a while back on doing a "favorites" blog entry and due to hospitalizations and pregnant ward members and a plethora of other Shando responsibility we have yet to get that blog together so here it is now.

When I started to make my own mental list of Shando's favorites I was having a hard time coming up with anything. Which is odd. Because we talk every day and I'm pretty aware of what annoys her and what doesn't - but I had to ask her "What do you actually really love?" And to be frank, her answers quite surprised me, in fact, I had no idea. So here goes:

We do not need to go into detail about this but near the top of the list is the aforementioned love of Tab: So we'll make it number 1.


Next up at number two is pregnancy & delivery. Shando will watch shows all day long about the pregnant and in her dream job she would be a nurse who helped deliver these women...(hmmm which makes me wonder if she's ever considered becoming a mid-wife or a dula? is that how you spell it? I don't even know - I really need to have some more substantive conversations with her obviously, what are we talking about for hours every day?)

Number three really surpised me: Fishing
What?
This is what she told me first thing when I asked her about her favorites. fishing When I got over my surprise and asked her Really? Why? Do you know what she said? Because they're free.

So number 4 should come as no surprise: Gardening


That's right, she said gardening. Does she have a garden? I've known her for 12 years now and a garden isn't something I've ever seen in her yard. She claims this may happen when she's an old lady. She also claims she grew some fabulous tomatoes from her porch when she lived in Flagstaff (bear in mind this was around 18 years ago). Again, I was quite surprised. Want to know what gardening and Fishing have in common? They are both foods you can get for free.

5. Speaking of free. One thing of note here is that Shando is not a big fan of clothes. I'm not going to say too much about this but you should never show up at her door with the expectation that people are going to be dressed. I think she imagines this is how it is at everyone's home. She thinks you will know not to expect them to be dressed. By way of warning...just sayin'.


Also on our list #6 : Rain

Now I know she loves rain. We fight about this frequently. I am no fan of the rain. I love the sun. But I did not fully realize one of the reasons for this love of the rain until this conversation about favorite things. It's free water.

#7
Shan loves nothing more than to buy her Life & Style on a friday and settle in for the evening with her magazine and a Tab. It's mindless. It's cheap entertainment. It makes us feel better that even though celebrities have fame and money and sometimes talent and looks
and other perks like maids and a laundress and a personal cook, they also have problems and this may seem petty, or even meanspirited but really, it is just reassuring.

Also, this is nearly free information. And information is power - or so Shando tells me all the time.

8.

make no mistake - Shando does not advocate drug abuse. Vicodin requires a prescription and should never be taken unless under a doctors direction and care. However, it's fabulous. Just sayin'. (also not bad if combined with the Tab and Life & Style combination above)

You know I started thinking about this list of favorites and I realized something about Shando I had never before realized. Put all of those things in a blender and what do you get? It's not obvious but I think you'll agree that you get some combination of this:

Rain+Free = Hippies at Woodstock
Ditto Here - And you know combine the ideas of free food, gardening in particular (remember the earlier mention of Flagstaff and tomatoes? I went to the 4th of July parade in Flagstaff once - there was a plentitude of hippy free love everywhere) -earthiness (midwife or dula anyone?), drugs, nakedness...I think Shando is a closet Hippy.
Who knew?


Peace BABY!

In light of this I think she might have to give up the Tab though - especially in light of this commercial from the 1970s for Tab - it's anti-thesis of Shando's hippy ideal. Watch at your own risk, it might make you want to stab any male in the vicinity :

'70s TaB Cola Commercial

Posted Jan 16, 2007

TaB was originally marketed as a more healthful soft drink for women using the obnoxious catchphrase, "Be a mind sticker."

So which is it Shando? Are you trying to be a mind-sticker? Or a hippy?

We interupt this snarky blog with an important message...The Disclaimer Clause

Recently Shando expressed concern that she looked - well, perhaps less than kind in the representation of her here on her blog. Let me point out all of Shannon's good qualities lest anyone is unaware of them. Shannon does the following things on a regular basis: Calls MANY people just to check up on them and make sure they are okay, aranges for meals to be brought in, rides to be given, food to be found, and gives free medical advice (which most of the time is better than the advice you'll get if you spend an hour or two at the doctor's office). She drives her kids around all the time and even though she talks tough, she's a bit of a pushover when it comes to her family and making them happy - she'll do almost anything for them. She works at 3 different jobs at any given time to make ends meet. She a list maker and a doer. She's organized and a quick wit. She likes to laugh and often laughs at herself. She's a good sport. She's always helpful and generous, sometimes to a fault.

Now that we've got that out of the way - we'll continue with the snarky blog next entry.

The Disclaimer Language: Events and people discussed in this blog may be re-named or diguised or fictional - similarities to living or dead actual people may be coincidence.

Beauty

Shando kind of has a philosophical side. One of her ideas is that if you're really pretty, or skinny, or rich you damn well better not be annoying as hell. The way Shando sees it, you're already getting on her last nerve with your good fortune in one of the afroementioned areas, you had better get busy redeeming yourself by being especially kind, nice, generous, warm, real, funny, helpful or an extraordinarily humble person. Otherwise, you might be really gorgeous but as far as Shando is concerned you're as useless as "tits on a boar".

Did we mention you're getting on her damn nerves?

You just be Andy, I'll be your Pat Hackett

All during Andy Warhol's life he kept a diary. But not the kind of diary where you have to write anything down. No, Andy was way too avant-garde for that. He just called up his long suffering secretary everyday and dictated his diary to her over the phone. This is how we ended up with a Tome when Andy Warhol died heavy enough to serve as ship anchor in a pinch. We have Pat Hackett to thank.

I'm quite willing to be the Pat to Shando's Andy. Here's why:

1. I too am long-suffering.

2. I too desire to bring the world the unique perspective of a person who wishes to remain on the fringes (not in real life, but on the "internets", Shando is remarkably quiet, though she does lurk about, much in the way Andy was wont to do)

3. Shando is too busy to be bothered with writing in journals, or diaries, let alone writing in/on blogs.

4. Shando is quite a fascinating person with fascinating thoughts - she calls me everyday, she tells me those thoughts, I can share some of her thoughts with you.

5. Shando gives me all the details. Andy used to tell Pat how much his cab cost, the morning paper, and his cup of coffee. I usually get these same notes from Shando everyday. Want to know what Shando ate for breakfast? I can probably tell you (today it was Crepes).

6. I like to find additional time-wasters, this would definitely rank right up there at the top of such a list. (do not confuse this by thinking I have time to waste - no, contraire, but I take time wasting to an art form, don't question it, it works for me much in the way prozac works for other people)

7. We all need our daily dose of Shando


On another note - the blog has been named "Keeping Tab" this is because we are; keeping tabs on Shando, keeping tab with Shando, and Shando loves her TaB. The coca-cola company makes TaB. If they ever quit making it do not be surprised if violence is committed by Shando in the name of her Holy Tab. Coke named TaB, TaB, because it stood for "keeping tab".

So let's keep tab with Shando and see where her adventures take us.